Actually this isn’t about the FSM; it’s about Momofuku Ando.
Who, you ask? Who’s that?
The inventor of ramen noodles, I answer.
Oh, you say, nonplussed. Well, what about him?
He’s dead, I tell you. He was 96.
The family asks that in lieu of flowers, unused seasoning packets be sent.
His body will be dehydrated, broken in half, immersed in boiling water, then interred in a private bowl.
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