MSNBC passes along the “news” that Laura Bush will go under the knife Saturday. Tragically it’s not an ass­holec­tomy, so we’re still gonna be stuck with George; no, she’s going to have work done on some pinched nerves in her neck.

That might go a long way toward explain­ing the bizarre lack of abil­ity her face seems to have; specif­i­cally, she always seems to smile all the time, but she never smiles with her eyes, and it’s really damn creepy.1 Used to be peo­ple made fun of Hillary Clinton for her pantsuit, and after a while she changed into other things. But appar­ently Laura Bush is trag­i­cally unable to change,2 afflicted with what­ever mal­ady drove poor old Jack Napier over the edge.

Check under the fold for pho­to­graphic evi­dence of the truth of my asser­tions. Note how, from image to image, there’s a sort of empti­ness around the eyes best described by Robert Shaw:

Lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eye. When he comes at ya, doesn’t seem to be livin’. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white.

Oh wait, that’s from Jaws, isn’t it?

The Incredible Single-​​Expressioned Woman:

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1. It’s also famil­iar to any­one who knows any right-​​wing ultra-​​Christian con­verts. They all have the same vapid, mind­less frozen grins, with eyes that look a lit­tle too man­i­cally in denial to be comfortable.

2. Rather like her husband.

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