The Indigestible

So CNN is sucking Bill off.

Some say his wealth and famous opportunism are reminiscent of the robber barons of yore. Yet here is a man who has set a goal to eradicate malaria. Rich as he is - his net worth is an estimated $50 billion - you can’t call the man greedy when he has pledged to give back to humanity all but a tiny fraction of 1% of that fortune.

Nutgraf aside, Bill Gates is a thief, self-aggrandizer and general all-around bastard. His stealing of DOS is a legendary tale; his knowledge in 1994 that Win95 would be a virus test bed of an OS is a matter of record; his callous disregard for aesthetics is obvious in every OS MS has ever made. To lionize him now and make him into a business poster boy is a bit like promoting Michelle Malkin as an ideal commentator, human being and Christian. In order to make it possible, you have to overlook basically everything that’s known, disregard years of recorded truth, and forgive every likely plausible future transgression as well.

But in the Land of the Buck, where the most profitable corporations in the last five years are all war profiteers (cf. Blackwater et. al.), I suppose MS is close to softcore porn for economists and those who like their money just a bit less bloody.

The fact that Bill likes to read and drive is just the iceberg’s tip. He’s a manipulating, scheming, greedy bastard who doesn’t spend one moment thinking about anyone but himself. If he’d been killed by a meteorite strike in 1991, you would not today have to scan every email you receive for viruses (Mac and Linux users still don’t); he doesn’t give a shit in an outhouse for what the rest of the world has to tolerate on his behalf under the tyranny of the worst OS in recorded history; and no amount of gilded storytelling will change the reality.

This is why no one with an MBA is fit to do anything but sit in a corner, drool and have baby food administered thrice daily via mouth syringe. My single sole hurdle every day in executing my work is some tard with an MBA who thinks his ability to obfuscate the most transparent sentences (”We’re leveraging our assets to craft a memo on that topic at this moment” as opposed to “I’ll put it on a sticky note”) is somehow worthy of respect.

It was marketroids that made Gates; it was marketroids that drank the MS Kool-aid.

I hate being a graphics nerd in a non-Mac world; but more, I hate being a code geek on an MS-ruled planet.

As an engineer, Windows offends because it’s awkward, clumsy and needy. It’s like a small child who, while you’re trying to have a conversation, keeps pestering you with “mom mom mom, look at me mom, look at what I’m doing, hey mom, hey mom, hey look at me, are you watching me, hey mom, mom, hey lookit this, hey mom, hey mom lookit this, are you watching, hey mom, mom, mom…”

(”Click OK to continue”)

As an artist, it offends me even more. MS is guilty of being ugly as a mule fucking a woman.

A scrawny mule. With mange.

Fuck Bill Gates, fuck his read-and-drive habit, fuck anyone who ever tries to defend him, and fuck his dirty money. And fuck CNN for turning him into a living martyr to capitalism’s most obscene, under-the-table excesses. I hope he dies fast. Like metastatic pancreatic cancer fast.

We never needed him, and we goddamn sure don’t need more like him.