It com­mences with a lovely guer­rilla idea culled shame­lessly from The Shed Prank.

This is a Discordian oper­a­tion; as Epopt of the north­west­ern Arizona region of the Cult of Wiener-​​Eaters in the name of Eris, as Grand Holy Pope of My House and Cats, I, Waxis42 Prang (the sane), KSC, FCD, declare this to be a Holy and Just Exercise in the Name of My Goddess.

Or some­thing like that.

n.b. The com­men­su­rate orgy is optional based on (1) num­ber of par­tic­i­pants [1 is not suf­fi­cient for the Event to be declared an Orgy, unless of course you have mul­ti­ple per­son­al­i­ties]; (2) ages of said Participants [let’s not go Catholic here]; and (3) there is no third con­di­tion [though Goats and Other Assorted and Sundry Farm Animals might dissent].

Target: Home Depot

Subtarget: Their lonely dis­play of sheds

Goal: Post bizarre mes­sages in said sheds to the larger pop­u­lace in an effort to see who among them are Persons, as opposed to being Cabbages or something

Reason: None

Operative details below the fold.

1. Download the attached PDF.
2. Print it out.
3. Tape the print­outs inside demo-​​model sheds left for­lorn and alone in Home Depot park­ing lots across the US.
4. Profit. (Oh, wait, no.)

Preview images:

You know what to do. Now commence!

(As a bonus, many Home Depots offer free hot dogs on week­ends, so you can par­take joy­ously of the Sacrament after you have com­pleted your divine charge.)

Hail Eris! All hail Discordia!


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