The Indigestible

It’s not all that funny, really — but the head­line, for some rea­son, really tick­led me. Male panda gets too fat for sex I didn’t know pan­das even watched football!

1,000 peo­ple marched against crime in New Orleans on Thursday, CNN tells us. In an unre­lated story, police report that 1,000 homes were bro­ken into in New Orleans on Thursday.

Maybe Rick Santorum was right after all. Maybe by redefin­ing mar­riage as open to les­bian and gay cou­ples, man-​​​​on-​​​​dog sex really is inevitable. And maybe these two are just vic­tims of The Homosexual Agenda… As long as they’re prac­tic­ing safe sex, I guess it’s okay.

WASHINGTON — President Bush said Wednesday he’ll sub­mit a five-​​​​year bud­get pro­posal that will bal­ance the fed­eral bud­get by 2012 and called on Congress to sharply cut back on costly pet projects hid­den in spend­ing bills. Who are you, and what have you done with the real Textard?

There’s a lovely, lively set of mul­ti­far­i­ous dis­cus­sions tak­ing place at Pharyngula on the mer­its of the­ism, deism, athe­ism and the value of telling dis­senters to leave the coun­try. Behold. There’s noth­ing like a lit­tle war on after Christmas to help that turkey digest.

Perusing a recent Swift on James Randi’s site, I came across a prod­uct that is gen­uinely worth men­tion­ing. DVD Rewinder The DVD Rewinder is a great gift for the tech­ni­cal savvy, the couch potato, teens with too much time on their hands, and the gad­get buff! This leads me to ask: When, o when, will some bril­liant inven­tor cre­ate an MP3 […]

The Times says “Black Friday” was good for malls. Interspersed in its arti­cle are com­ments such as: The clock struck mid­night. Then the mall struck back.* And Emily Spendlove, 35, drove 45 min­utes to wait in line out­side the Fashion Place Mall on Thursday night, skip­ping sleep “to be part of the excite­ment.” Am I the only one […]

So Friday’s my birth­day; I’ll be 39. That doesn’t mat­ter. What mat­ters is silly, fool­ish, ego­tis­ti­cal. When I was work­ing at HOTS, no one remem­bered the day, though I signed oth­ers’ cards. Year after year I was for­got­ten. It got to be a run­ning joke. “What … we for­got again?” “…Yeah.” Got some recalls here and there, like in […]

One of the things I’ve pointed out over the years is that the Biblical lit­er­al­ist who says homo­sex­u­al­ity is “wrong” because of Leviticus is over­look­ing Jesus, who said explic­itly that he was bring­ing a new law — and who never said any­thing for or against homo­sex­u­al­ity. I stand cor­rected. In a recent post, Pam dis­cusses a talk­ing Jesus […]

I’m not going to use this story against our mil­i­tary. A US Army sol­dier has pleaded guilty to rap­ing a 14-​​​​year-​​​​old Iraqi girl and help­ing mur­der her and her fam­ily. But you can be sure the Qaeda will. They’ll damn us all for the actions of a few — which is sort of how peo­ple like Coulter, […]

Cassini has taken images of a hur­ri­cane near Saturn’s south­ern pole. Fox News has already launched a satel­lite in antic­i­pa­tion of get­ting not-​​​​at-​​​​all-​​​​racist video of black Saturnians loot­ing while white ones merely find provisions.

My hope for today is that we’ll act with wis­dom, and not do any­thing we may be ashamed of.