While the new three-level pricing on iTunes is marginally interesting, of much greater importance is that iTunes is terminating DRM. You can upgrade all the songs in your library purchased from them to DRM-free versions à la iTunes Plus.1 About time, too. DRM is for teh shiteheads. ==== 1. At 94 items to upgrade (singles […]
Archive for the ‘Snarks’ Category
Who says Islam is sexist?
How can it be when they’re using women as suicide bombers? I suppose the burqas and veils make the bombs easier to hide. And what do their 72 virgins look like? Late-teen premature ejaculators?
That Explains the Rictus
MSNBC passes along the “news” that Laura Bush will go under the knife Saturday. Tragically it’s not an assholectomy, so we’re still gonna be stuck with George; no, she’s going to have work done on some pinched nerves in her neck. That might go a long way toward explaining the bizarre lack of ability her face seems […]
Colonoscopy Completed, Unsuccessful
Despite hours of concerted effort by several proctologists, President Bush’s colonoscopy proved unsuccessful. “We were unable to locate the president’s head,” said Dr. Ken K. Coldfinger. “We have no idea where it might be now.” However, Coldfinger noted that the procedure was not a complete failure. “At least we were able to remove the vice-president’s arm,” he said.
Naked Brothers Band Having Sex With Their Preteen Lolita Phone Numbers Boys and Girls Naked Hentai!
Just fucking with the inlink stats. Christ, I’m tired of getting hits from pervs looking for preteen porn just because I posted something on NBB n+now fucking months ago. I get search hits for hentai, naked brothers band having sex, boys and girls having sex and other things even less savory. My one NBB post is […]
Supreme Court: US Government in Violation of Antitrust Laws
WASHINGTON — In a landmark ruling today, the Supreme Court found 9–0 that the United States federal government was in violation of antitrust laws and ordered it broken up immediately. Writing for the majority, Antonin Scalia had this to say. His words are offered without further comment. ==== The definition of a monopoly is well-established and has […]
Prayin’ In the Land Down Unda
TOAD SUCK, AR — Cloyd Jackson is just like any other Arkansan who’s felt the hand of God: He’s a man with a literal — and literalist — mission. Founder and First Pope of the Righteous Church of Fosterology, Jackson appears to be a more or less unassuming man living a modest life just beyond his means in a twelve-foot […]
Chaos Reigns as Dire Predictions All Prove True
WASHINGTON — President George Bush urged the nation to calm today in the wake of the complete chaos and social breakdown which took place a mere two days after the Democratic takeover of congress. “I want to assure the American people that their leadership is still intact, and that we’re already taking measures to quell the […]
Bush: We Must Fight the Terror Birds There, to Avoid Fighting Them Here
WASHINGTON — President George W. Bush said today that he was “gravely concerned” about intelligence reports suggesting that South America was providing sanctuary to terrorism. “I was watching that crazy beasts show on Discovery and they talked about these terror birds,” Bush said. “Did you know they eat horses? Whoo boy, I wouldn’t want to have […]
Create Your Own Slogan!
Pam @ House Blend passes on a lovely story about courts. A branch of the Sea Scouts — Boy Scouts with water wings, it seems — in California has been denied use of public berthing facilities because of the BSA’s openly discriminatory stance against gays and atheists. The case was tossed out of court; apparently bigotry is […]
Safer?
Small plane crashes into NYC building. Hey, Mr. “tough on terror” Republican: How, exactly, have we become safer from airborne attack since 11 September 2001?
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